by BrijBrand Contributor, Robbi Crawford
Life is filled with choices!
We decide when to wake up, what to do first, what to wear, what to eat for breakfast, when to leave, what route to take, when to go to work, who to text, when to study, when to hang out with your friends, when to tell your boy or girlfriend that it’s over, when should you talk to your professor about that “D” paper and if you can resubmit it, when to ask for help with your rent and tuition, who to ask for help – parents, friends, significant other, etc.
The list seems endless, right?
Your experiences with choice can be anxiety ridden, an adventure in flow, or something in between.
Choice is SO hard, which is why it seems easier to just defer the big ones, stick your head in the sand and hope they’ll take care of themselves.
Weighing your options – which one is best, which one is right for you at the time, which one will keep your parents off your back, which one will lead to success, which one will lead to more money, which one will help you keep your relationship, which one will get you the recognition you’ve been seeking, which one will lead to more peace and contentment, etc.
Is there a way to make choice easier? Absolutely!
Begin with YOU – practice being more aware about what you deeply desire, what you really care about, who you want to be, how you want to show up in the world and what you want to contribute. When you start with YOU versus the opinions of others and other external pressures, it eases some of the heaviness and difficulty associated with your decision making process.
Even if what you want or your desired destination isn’t crystal clear, you at least have some basic criteria as a guide.
I had a conversation with a young lady this week who just recently graduated. She’s standing at the precipice of a new chapter in her life, peering out into the unknown, ready to leap, but not sure where she wants to land.
She’s had lots of experiences and made tons of smart choices over the last few years that will serve her well.
She is aware of who she is and has some awareness around what she deeply desires and cares about, but her challenge now is choosing from a long list of desirable options.
Because she’s been laying a pretty solid foundation and taking time to become more and more aware of who she is and what she really wants, etc., the conversation about next steps didn’t start at zero.
Whether you haven’t a clue or you have too many desirable options, the choice game can always be won when you start with you.
Having your own unique criteria based on what you know to be true about you – your preferences, desires, what it takes to function at your best emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually; what you value; the thoughts and beliefs that drive your best decisions; etc., can make all the difference.
HERE’S A RECOMMENDATION: Set aside about 30 minutes or so on a regular basis to capture in writing what you know to be TRUE about YOU, what you truly value – your non negotiables, and some of your core beliefs about how the world works.
Don’t rush through it, take your time and write with no filters, no criticism, no judgment. See what you come up with.
Not a writer? Take a 30+ minute walk.
Don’t want to walk? Take 30+ minutes to sit in a quiet place.
Don’t want to sit? Engage in some activity that frees your mind and allows some time for you to reflect.
What you do doesn’t matter as much as it allows some quality time for contemplation.
Taking some time to explore and create your own personal philosophy can be very enlightening, liberating and empowering.
It will form the basis of your criteria when it’s time to make those hard choices.
The other hard thing about choice is every time you say YES to one thing, you have to say NO to something else. In other words, every time you choose this, you lose that.
A great way to proceed is to be as clear as you can at the time about your criteria so the loss, whatever it is, isn’t so painful because you know what matters most to you and you know the general direction of where you’re headed.
PERSONAL AWARENESS paves the way!
Robbi Crawford, The Student’s Mentor, Author and Speaker is the founder of BrijBrand.co. Subscribe below so you don’t miss a post. Visit our website BrijBrand and get on the list. And follow us on Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn. We’re here to help you get where and what you want.